I'm able to get dates, but I have such low confidence that I automatically assume they just want to be friends. - ATX News Paper

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Saturday, September 1, 2018

I'm able to get dates, but I have such low confidence that I automatically assume they just want to be friends.

So to start this off, I want to put it out there that I'm below average, average looking at best. I'm not fat or anything, but I'm definitely not attractive and 80% of my matches on Tinder/Bumble/Okcupid are with people I'm not attracted to or people not near me.

When I do get matched with someone I'm attracted to though, I'm able to be pretty confident online(I mean who isn't) but once it escalates into an actual date, I automatically assume they think I'm too ugly and think they don't want anything more than friendship. This is (probably?) all in my head because of my low self esteem, because it's not like they hinted they only want to be friends, but how do I convince myself to be more confident? How do I actually flirt instead of giving off a friend vibe, when I'm this low on self esteem? Obviously they have to be somewhat attracted to me if they matched with me and agreed to go on a date, right..? But I can't help but think they just see me as too unattractive.

How do I start fixing this? How do I make sure they know I want to be more than friends without being creepy?

submitted by /u/PM_ME_TO_VENT_FREELY
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