I'm a 21 year old guy and I am struggling to find a girlfriend. I have never really had a girlfriend before - there was one time when I was younger where I was very close to a girl and our relationship was slowly heading in that direction, but she wanted to start dating and I wanted to stay friends. In the past I had always believed that it would be something that would happen naturally given enough time. I had always imagined that I would meet the girl of my dreams, we'd become close friends, fall in love, and then live happily. However that hasn't happened yet, and while I understand that I am still young, and that I don't need to rush, I feel like I should be having at least a little more success than I am.
I don't want to sound full of myself/superficial, however I'd like to believe that I would be a good boyfriend. I am kind, patient, and caring, I'm fairly attractive and do put effort into how I dress. I am mature for my age, and I have a decent sense of humor.
More recently I have been finding new hobbies, including learning to cook, and watching k-dramas. I picked up these hobbies only because I enjoy them, however I do think that they're hobbies that I would have in common with many girls my age, and so I believe that would help me out too.
My greatest weaknesses in regards to dating would be that I am shy, I don't really get many chances to meet new people, and I am stubborn, albeit not incredibly stubborn.
Recently a friend of mine convinced me to try using Tinder. For a long time I had decided against using tinder because I felt like it would be full of people only looking for a hookup, and no one seriously looking for something more long-term. I feel for the most part that I was right, and that tinder has been a waste of time, although at least I feel like I'm doing something more than just waiting.
I suspect that my difficulties finding a girlfriend are as a result of three major factors:
- I don't meet enough new people.
- I tend to wait for the girl to make the first move, because I am too shy, which rarely happens.
- My standards are probably too high.
It would be awesome to get some feedback on what I can try!
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