Is it smart or weird to tell acquaintances you're single and ask if they could set you up on any dates? - ATX News Paper

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Sunday, April 7, 2019

Is it smart or weird to tell acquaintances you're single and ask if they could set you up on any dates?

28M here. I once read the advice that if you're unemployed, you should tell everyone you meet that you're looking for a job. Why not do this for dating? This sounds like a good plan in my head but that doesn't mean it is. (I googled and here's an article saying that it is.) Of course, I'd have no problems asking this of a friend I know well, but such friends tend to know mostly the same people as me or would already have recommended me their friend had they known of a good match.

I meet a fair number of people in my age group through a hobby and see them regularly, sometimes for years. "Acquaintance" is probably selling it short but I don't really know much about most of them outside of this hobby. I'd like to ask them to set me up with any friends they have that they think would be a good match. Most of them are women and I worry about how I would say this without it sounding like I'm trying to ask them on a date. This isn't a scheme to subtly ask them out and anyway I'd rather not come across as "that guy" that cashes after every girl he meets. Also, I'd like to make it clear that I'm looking for (potential) serious relationships, I'm not asking them to be a hook-up app.

I'm far enough out of a breakup that I'm back on the market, I really don't feel like getting back into online dating but that's where almost all my dating experience has come from. This seems like a reasonable alternative.

My questions:

  • Could this come across as weird, creepy, or desperate?
  • If not, how should I go about asking this clearly? I had trouble wording the title correctly; I really want to say something more like that they should know I'm single and to keep me in mind if they have friends that might be a match. I don't want to say "you need to find me a date" or "set me up with anyone you know, I'm desperate." I just want to make it clear I'm open to being matchmaker'd and to keep me in mind.
  • Have any of you done this? How did it go?
submitted by /u/averagebat
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