Hi guys,
I have this huge problem, which already affected some of my relationships. Every time I talk with a girl I start questioning her actual intentions and framing them usually in a bad way. I start overthinking, why she is talking to me. For example if I have a girl, that likes to go out with me, texts first etc. I start questioning the intention, that she is not actually interested in something more with me, but only like me as a friend (this during the first days/weeks after meeting her) or that she is just bored, wants to show off in front of friends etc. If she texts me from an unusual place or unusual time I start thinking she was just bored. Sometimes after going out with her I start thinking she maybe was too shy to say she wants to leave, or is out with me just because she is bored, or just has nothing else to do. Talking to more girls does not help, because I still overthink them and it makes it worse. Suddenly I am talking to 4 girls which i would want something more with (sex or a more intimate relation), but I overthink every one of them and it is killing me lately.
Just as an example, two weeks ago I was out with a girl I have been seeing for some time. I started thinking she only goes out with me as she has noone else and is not actually interested in me. One day she had to leave quite early for a weird reason and I told her to text me regarding the following weekend. She texted me on 1 am Saturday, so I ignored the message as I was pissed she texted late. After 4 days of not even viewing it she messaged me how I am doing and if there is something wrong. I said I am good and that I just closed the message and after I did not reply to her other message as she was texting from a bus and I thought she was texting just because she was bored and randomly saw it while scrolling, not because she was actually interested about me.
Is there a rule you guys go by ? How do I solve this ? Is it worth trying to think about it this way ? Thanks.
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