Hello world , I am (male 23) currently dating a co worker (female 29 ) which at the beginning started as joking around in front of co workers kinda flirting , eventually things got a little more serious and we started talking going out etc.... I want to clarify that I haven’t asked her to be my girlfriend, even tho she has told me many times why haven’t I asked her too, which I always reply I like taking my time to know someone before I officially date them . So the problem with me and her is that I feel like she always manipulate me when I try to say something or talk about our relationship with eachother and even at times when I’ve tried breaking up what we have she has tried to made me the bad person or the person that does the least here and that she’s the one that has everything to lose yet she’s with me. I’ve been having an idea that she has had an ex lover back to her life for a while but the trust keeps fading, even tho she says she could have him yet she wants me, her actions sometimes makes me think she only says that to manipulate me to not leave her. She usually has a routine that she calls me on her way to work, sometimes after work and texts me Thru the day even if I’m sleeping ( we both work overnight shifts) lately sometimes she hasn’t been calling and the texting has slowed down when she isn’t with me . And yes might sound insecurity I get that, but this doesn’t sound like she used to or always have been in 3-4 months we have been dating. Not too long ago ( a week ago) I caugh her before work having an argument with the ex lover , which she said she just called to say sorry about a past issue they had , which to me didn’t make sense , why now? Why did she cared if it was past?? So many questions , I told her I don’t trust her as I used to that it’s hard to take out my doubts from the back of my head but she always try to make it seem like is me , and I’m making stuff up. Last time I tried to ending things she didn’t stop calling me the next day even tho I wasn’t answering , eventually I did because She told me she wanted to see me before work so I thought it was something important yet she just wanted to tell me how much she missed me and went to hug me and kiss me. During the time we didn’t talk she posted two things to her what’s app story and one of them was the song lonely by Justin Bieber which that day when we saw eachother she told me that was for me . What should I do ? How can I try to end this if this is indeed manipulation after I’ve tried 3 times already ? FYI she also has a daughter which makes me think sometimes she’s very insecure that someone is gonna want her. This whole situation gives me anxiety and confusion. I have a daily battle between what I believe is happening or doubting her sketchiness vs what she says . My mental peace isn’t the same and I’ve never been like this, but she makes me confused sometimes to either is me overthinking , I’ve already had three friends telling me she’s manipulating me to stop seeing her but it isn’t easy.
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