Resentment?? - ATX News Paper

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Monday, December 7, 2020

Resentment??

My gf (26f) and I (25f) have been dating for about 9mo now and living together for 3mo, I moved away from home, which is 5 hours away, to move in with her...

When I first met her she was a *party* girl... she smoked daily (weed and cigarettes'), stayed drunk daily and at some points was doing drugs. No offense to anyone who has this lifestyle but it's not for me. I see no fun in all that. I was not going to pursue a relationship with her because I knew eventually this would become a problem. To my surprise she actually quit all that during the time we talked (5mo) she was not smoking anything, no drugs, only social drinking.. I never asked her to change or to stop doing these things. I was excited bc I loved who she was while she was clean. I have expressed to her after she stopped that I never liked that..

flash forward 9mo later, we are living together,, I go home for some weekends, she stays home and I found out she is doing all that all over again but behind my back... I know bc I read the messages between her and her friends. She does allow me to go through her phone. I am terrified bc what if she misses this life and I am holding her back? She never hangs out/does that with her friends when I am around, just when I am out of town...

Its so funny how I have no fear of her cheating on me but I am terrified she will seek her old life back and resent me for changing her ways for me... I am scared that she'll end up leaving me because she can't be herself around me...

Idk am I overthinking this too much? (this is also my first serious relationship in YEARS)

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