We've been dating for around 3 months. Things were fiery and hot and passionate during this time. He spent the night at my place 5-6 days per week, we exercised together, cooked and ate dinner together, etc.
But recently I found myself needing some space. I said to him, "Babe, I think I need a few days of alone time. Just to be in my own bed (alone), tidy up a bit, and just vibe out on my own time.
He took this the wrong way and his mind went haywire. He suspects cheating and thinks I'm no longer interested in him. Here's a conversation we had recently over text. I'm sorry it's so long.
So, as you can see, he lashed out and told me he feels unloved, uncared for, and that he's not getting anything out of our relationship despite his willingness to compromise and sacrifice everything, as he says.
This hurt my feelings because I truly feel I've compromised and done a lot for him:
- he's met my family and all my best friends (despite me not meeting any of his)
- he's welcome at my place whenever. i do our laundry, cook for us, buy toiletries and soaps and towels so he can be comfortable with long stays here
- i wait up for him to get off of work at 1am so we can spend a little time together before I fall asleep (and have to be up at 9am myself for work)
- i drive us everywhere
- we smoke my weed all day
- i include him in activities that otherwise would have just been me and my friends
- i party and drink with him and his friends on the weekends -- the only time i really have to myself. By Monday morning I'm completely spent and have felt my performance decreasing at work
You get the point I'm trying to make.
Last night, we spoke about the comments he made, and he was very apologetic. He says he doesn't know what got into him and he regrets what he said and how he treated me:
I told him I need the weekend to figure out how I want to move forward with our relationship. I really like this man and enjoy his company and love, but he's shown me that he can lose his temper and say many things he doesn't mean in the heat of the moment -- only to apologize and say he didn't mean any of it the next day. This comes off as quite abusive (gaslighting?) to me, whether intentional or not.
I appreciate his self-reflection and acceptance of responsibility for this, but it doesn't change that it happened and I'm not sure how to process this or how to move forward.
Any ideas, guys?
TLDR -- Boyfriend said some mean things while he was upset, which he now regrets and is apologizing for. Do I let him go or give him another shot?
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