I'll start with some context: like a lot of people here I’m a 23 year old guy that has absolutely no experience with women. This is mostly due to self-esteem issues and insecurities, which I’ve been working on for the past few years. My social anxiety makes it difficult and painful for me to talk to women I’m interested in, but I think I’m a relatively attractive person so once I get a better handle on facing rejection I think I’ll have more success.
I get the impression that women generally don’t like being approached by men they don’t know, because it can make them uncomfortable. This is understandable because a significant amount of people are creepy and cross boundaries. My problem is that my social anxiety makes it difficult to tell if I’m one of those people or not. Every time I want to talk to a girl I’m interested in, my brain screams at me that it’s a terrible idea and I shouldn’t do it, and I’m having a hard time figuring out when it actually IS a bad idea, vs when my brain is just “lying” to me.
This is a problem because I get the impression that if I want to get more comfortable talking to women, I have to talk to women. Obviously I don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable, but this is a big reason why I don’t talk to women I’m interested in at all. I need to change this, but I’m having a hard time judging when approaching someone is inappropriate, because approaching someone always seems inappropriate to me.
I don’t know if this post makes any sense, but if it does, I’d love to hear if anybody has any advice on how to make better judgments in this area. Thanks in advance!
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