I suspect a large reason for this is my ethnicity. I’m Indian-American in a largely white city. They don’t view me a potential partner. They’ve never considered a guy like me as a romantic partner.
I have a lot of great features, like my hair, eyebrows, eyelashes, eyes, teeth, etc. I’m frequently complimented on all of these things. By men and women. I get it. Just because a woman compliments you doesn’t mean she’s interested. But what’s strange with me is that I get compliments from women who aren’t interested in me that normally you’d only give to people you’re interested in.
I had to learn this hard way. I’ve had women come over to tell me that I’m “gorgeous”, or that I’m the “most attractive person at the bar”, but they weren’t interested in the slightest. Some of these women had boyfriends even, but I guess it wasn’t weird to say that to a man like me because I wasn’t an option to them.
It’s weird. When my friends ask me why I don’t just go for it because “they’re clearly interested”, I don’t know what to say. They find me good-looking in the way one would find a painting good-looking.
This isn’t always the case, of course. It just makes it hard for me to discern what would otherwise be called blatant flirting. Men I meet at the bar always ask why a guy like me doesn’t have three girls around me. It’s just funny to me now though.
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