So this is going to probably be confusing and overly complex due to my situaition, but I think the details are necassary to form the complete picture. Im 29M, around 350# have a multitude of health and pain problems, and am what I would consider drasticly "behind" in life. Since 16 ive been in constant pain, it completly put my life on pause at 20 where I then spent the next 8 years dealing with doctors, lawyers, etc trying to get both treatment, and disability, after my 6th denial my lawyer gave up on the case, and me and my family ended up moving in with more family a few states away to the woods about 45 min from the local metro area (college, tourism and party focused town), its been over a year now, I have been working FT for rideshare, and part time for a buddies buisness remote. Neither of my jobs are "social" jobs and because of limited options due to my health im currently stuck with rideshare as my primary income until a time my freinds buissness is big enough I can go full time into managment, and just the way the local market is this means i have to work nights and sleep during the day. This of course makes having a social life a near impossibility and dating even harder than that. I have had no luck on dating apps despite, seeking constant advice from my freinds back home (the ones in LTR/marriage that met on dating apps), changing my bios/pics etc, and even having my freinds (and their wives) write my bios, read the way im messaging etc. Around the last 6 months I have been consistently using the dating apps again. Ive only had around 7 matches, and only ever got past a sentence with 2 women, and while we hit it off and were talking daily, exchanging numbers, facetiming etc, both eventually ghosted after standing me up. The general advice ive seen does not seem to apply to me. While i have lost weight (down from 400+) 350 is pretty much where its going to stay as a healthy diet can only get you so far when excercise puts you in bed for weeks lol so the whole "hit the gym thing" isn't somthing I can really do, while I do low impact excersice (yoga, walking) it obviously is not enough to have any meaning full weight loss, just health benifits. As far as hobbies, meetups etc, I have both my physical capabilites to contend with along with the whole i work at night thing along with most of the activites in the area being food/booze/sports based and I live far enough away if i drink its a $150 uber home (plus ive cut my drinking down from 12-24 beers a day to at most 12 a month, and have only drank when i visit my freinds back home as I rather like not being an active alcholic anymore) Since I've lived here pretty much the only social activity ive done is went downtown once, and came out of the situation realizing I needed to stop drinking (and since have) and that my obvious issues (i walk with a limp, and you can see a deformity on my neck along with sometimes I just cant hide how much pain im really in) make social interactions that start in person, a no go. Ive completly overhauled my hygeine, the way I dress, drasticly lowered my dating standards etc. I'm not sure what else to even do other than accept that dating isn't for me. What exactly SHOULD I be doing/trying, while I'm sure i havent tried EVERYTHING, it sure feels like it. I feel like I'm just making "excuses" but I truly don't know what to even do anymore. Any advice?
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