What's up everyone,
first of all a bit about myself. I've been wasting the last 10 years playing games and spending most of my free time alone in front of my computer, having no friends at all. During this time, I pretty much forgot how to be social, how to talk to people, how to make conversation. Most importantly, I've never dated anyone, I literally have no clue about dating.
Now to the good news, recently I've been trying to actually build some social skills again and meet people. Originally I was going to just make a friend first, but I obviously "wouldn't mind" dating someone, after all, I've been single forever so I definitely would enjoy having a partner.
So how do I explain my problem. Let me start by saying that I've been studying Japanese in my free time for about a year, so I've been using an app to talk to natives and help each other learn languages wich is really cool. That's that. So a few months ago, I noticed a Japanese person living in the same city, and thought I'd message her, thinking it would be awesome to actually practice in person and maybe make a new friend at the same time. So I messaged her, we talked for a few days and I eventually asked her if she would be interested in meeting up. When I sent her that message, I also added "not in a dating way" ... lol. So I pretty much friend zoned myself before we even saw each other for the first time.
A week later, it happened, we met! And it went surprisingly well, we talked about all sorts of things, went to a café and a restaurant and both had a good time. Of course there was a bunch of awkward silence and me being awkward, but it was way better than I expected.
Now.. let me actually get to the point of this post. I'm sorry for this crazy long introduction. The thing is, despite telling her in advance that I'm not trying to ask her for a date, it kind of felt like a date?! The way we looked each other at times, I don't know. Before going home she asked me what I was doing the next weekend and if I'd like to meet again, obviously that doesn't mean much, I'm just adding it.
So the next time we met we went to a park, talking about a bunch of things again and we eventually drove to a restaurant to pick up some food. That's when something weird happened that I still can't explain. When I was carrying the food with her waking next to me I suddenly felt her hand reaching? for my hand that I had the bag in. So me being all confused I thought she wanted to carry the bag for some reason, so I asked her and she said no and laughed. I feel so stupid, but I'm still not sure if this was her trying to hold my hand, her trying to just reach for the food, or something else.
Since then we've met another 2-3 times, it's always been fun but nothing else "noteworthy" happened, that would imply that she wants to date me.
I wish I just knew if she's interested in dating me or not, that's really my problem. My intention before meeting her was really just to practice Japanese, help her practice English and make a friend. But I won't lie and pretend like wouldn't date her. The thing is, I really really don't want to make any step before being sure that she's interested. But the problem is, maybe she thinks I'm not interested in dating because I sent her that message earlier and I'm not making a first step. Oh man, I really suck at this. How can I find out if she's interested without making her feel uncomfortable or endangering out friendship?
I'd really appreciate any advice, thanks in advance! :)
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