I've been seeing this girl for a while, a little over a month. Tonight was our fourth date, and we talk over text quite a bit. Our first date was amazing, and I felt like we really connected. But over time, it just seems like she's lost interest or something. She messages me less and seems a little distant when I see her. Honestly, she's really busy between work and college and everything, so I get it. Still, it makes me confused as to where I stand. And she does keep agreeing to go out with me, which adds to the confusion.
That's not the main thing I'm confused about, though. Tonight after our date, I asked if I could kiss her. She's had a complicated history with guys, so I didn't want to just go in for it. I figured I should be respectful and just ask. Whatever the case, she got kind of awkward and said that she was touch-averse, so I just said ok and left, no fuss or anything. She did apologize, but I said it was ok. We hugged just before that, and she was originally the one who wanted to hug me from when we started going out, so it is kind of confusing to me. Like, how can you be touch-averse but always want to hug or whatever? But I digress.
She said she wanted to take things slow, and I definitely get that. But kissing for the first time on a fourth date seems pretty fucking slow to me. I can't shake the feeling that she's just not into me, but doesn't want to hurt my feelings or some dumb shit like that. My last girlfriend did exactly that, where when she did finally break up with me, she told me she only dated me because she felt sorry for me. She put off breaking up with me for months to "spare my feelings," but it just made it that much worse when it finally did happen. So now I have trust issues or whatever.
It's just so hard to know what to think. I don't know where I stand with her, and I want to ask, but I don't know if I'm allowed to. I'm just so confused about where I stand and where this is going, and I want something concrete to hold on to. But I don't know what to do.
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