I’m 22M, and I’ve never been in a relationship. Not even close. Every time someone—friends, relatives, even I myself—asks why I don’t go out with girls or ask someone out, I always default to the same old answer: “I need to focus on my studies.”
But honestly? That’s just a well-rehearsed excuse. My studies aren’t exactly flourishing either. The truth is, I feel stuck. Deep down, I often ask myself the painful question: “Why am I not good enough?”
People around me—family, friends —tell me I’m a “good guy.” I’m told I’m well-mannered, decent looking, respectful, and even emotionally intelligent. But none of that seems to translate into romantic interest. I’ve never experienced that rush of being liked back, the thrill of mutual affection. And over time, that absence starts to eat away at you.
I see people around me getting into relationships, experiencing love, heartbreak, connection—and I’m just… observing from the sidelines. I know relationships aren’t everything. But not having any experience makes me feel like I missed out on learning something fundamental. Like there's a secret language everyone else speaks and I never learned.
I don’t blame anyone. I don’t even blame myself fully. But the loneliness? It’s real. The self-doubt? Constant. I try to stay hopeful, but sometimes I wonder if something is inherently off with me.
If you’ve ever felt like this—or made it out of this mindset—I'd love to hear your thoughts.
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