(Apologies for formatting, I'm on mobile)
Hot damn what a year to choose this as a new years resolution. Luckily I still live with my family so loneliness didn't set in as hard as it could have, but yikers were those first few months killer. And for those of you wondering: yes, I did successfully complete this challenge, and by God am I glad I did.
To give you a bit of a background on why I even decided to do this. And to do that, let's go back to late 2019. First thing you should know about me, is I struggle with anxiety. Especially with new situations and new romantic relationships. I also tend to latch on to people pretty quickly, especially back then because I was pretty dang desperate. So you can imagine how my mental state was fairing when I was on Bumble and Tinder every day. It was a vicious cycle of getting excited about a new match, the anxiety increasing, then the disappointment of it falling through. So every day I was either insanely anxious, or depressed.
This obviously isnt super healthy lol, so on new years eve 2019, I decided to ditch all of it. And I immediately regretted it the day after lmao. Its kind of crazy how dating apps prey on your want to be in a relationship, while also low-key getting you addicted to swiping. So it was a double whammy of a withdrawal. It wasn't easy at all, the biggest reason being I didn't know how to meet anyone. If dating apps werent working, how TF would I find my future wife right?
Well after a few months of it getting progressively easier, I stopped having those thoughts. Now that I wasn't constantly trying to make myself fit with someone I barely know, I finally was given a chance to understand my standards and what kind of person I was looking for. My desperation has severely dropped off, which helps in keeping a clear head about if someone I meet is even an option or not.
I haven't magically gotten into a relationship since I made this choice, but I have been close. And with this newfound self awareness, I was able to make an informed decision. And even outside of romantic relationships, I've been able to understand myself better. Like I've started to figure out what my goals in life are, what I really want from my career, and I've finally found projects that I genuinely love to work on.
I know thats probably not what most people in this sub want to hear, but it's honestly what I needed. And this post isn't to say that you should also stop using dating apps, all I'm saying is that it's what I personally needed.
Dating apps themselves aren't all bad either. They really helped me grasp what I consider to be attractive. Everyone has a type, and these apps helped me figure out mine.
I think if you can take anything away from my unformatted ramblings is this: If dating apps are a source of anxiety and depression, an extended break may help you. I'm not a doctor, but I do know that it's helped me. And you don't have to leave them forever, just take a break to catch your breath.
Thanks for reading lol. I dunno if this has any value at all, but I said I'd make an update post so here it is.
TL;DR Didn't use dating apps for a year, and it helped my anxiety significantly while also helping me figure out the kind of person I'm looking for.
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