EDIT/CLARIFICATION/INFO: a lot of you guys are saying he’s proven to be flaky and will continue to do so. The times he bailed on me ended up all being from complications with ex/handing off children. That said now that I know the situation and he bails without explanation then obviously we got a problem. There’s lots of things o still don’t know and plan on asking him later this week when he returns. I really appreciate everyone’s help. I think I’ve determined the kids themselves don’t concern me...more the divorce and ex wife...
Mobile so sorry for formatting. Some context, I (F23) have recently been on a few dates with a (M27) man I met online, who I’ll call OM. OM and I have had a great time on the dates we went on but he was very flaky and I became annoyed. The last date was two weeks ago and he said he had something he wanted to tell in person the next time we hung out. Well he bailed a few times, including last night. I ended up going off on him over text, telling him how he didn’t respect my time and it was rude. Well he ends up calling me to explain what he had wanted to tell me in person, he is a dad with not just one kid BUT three kids. I was initially shocked but understanding, and it explained a lot of his behavior. We talked about it for a little while and agreed to talk more when he got back at the end of the week from a business trip. Here’s my dilemma, kids are not a deal breaker for me. However, my coworker I was asking for advice is adamant that being young I’m throwing my life away to settle down with someone else’s kids as well as dating someone in the middle of a divorce (OM and his ex have been separated since 2016). Now I’m questioning if I’m making the right choice. I’m not totally dedicated to settling down with OM, hell we’re not even dating! But I don’t think it’s right to bail out on the guy just because he has kids. I guess I’m looking for advice from young people who dated/married/were involved with people with kids/divorcees. As a 23 year old with plans to travel and such, am I “throwing my life away” as my coworker says? What were your experiences??
TDLR; seeing a guy who dropped the bombshell he has kids, coworker thinks I’m making a mistake by maybe dating him. Need advice/life stories from those more experienced than me.
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