I've been trying to meet women and I often find that the advice given seems to not line up with what is my real life experiences. For example.
- Meetup - People say "join a meetup!". Issue I have with this is everytime I've been to meetup groups, its been hugely male dominated. I'm talking 8-1 guys to gals. Then if you include women that are in their 20s or even early 30s, that number goes down even more. If there are any women in the group, most of the time they're being courted hard. Every guy has read somewhere that you meet women at meetups, so most of the guys there are doing that. Every city I've lived in so far has been this way. It always feels really strange for me to sit there in a group and try to go after someone when there's 8 other guys all trying to do the same thing at the same time.
- Friend Groups - Similar to Meetup. I try to keep my options open and meet as many people as I can. However, so many times the friendgroups I have been in have been male dominated. If there is a single attractive woman, I quickly learn of all the guys that are trying to get with her because they talk about it when shes not around. Plus you can tell how they are by how they act when she shows up (all of a sudden become more entergetic, ignore everything else and focus on her a ton, trying to impress her all the time, etc.).
- Online Dating - I'm not a great looking guy, I get that. But I get hardly any matches. I've tried everything from better photos, trying all the guides, etc. I maybe get 1 match a month and even then, the person is always difficult to talk to (short responses if they do, doesn't seem to participate in the conversation). I try to stay away from online dating cause I think it is horrible for self esteem.
- Classes/Clubs - Similar situation to 1 and 2. If there are people near my age, they're getting focused on hard.
- Bars/Nightclubs - I have a real trouble approaching people here. Can't hear anything and its impossible to talk to them I find.
Every guy I seem to meet isn't in a relationship from any of these things. They usually are in a relationship from someone they went to school with or knew from their childhood. All the gals I meet seem to be in a relationship that stems from online dating. Which is why I think 1, 2, and 4 aren't as good advice as people seem to suggest. Most women aren't doing these things if they're single, they're focusing on online dating.
So has anyone here truly had success doing these commonly suggested things? How did you manage to deal with all the nonsense I said above? I'm getting to the point where I'll just start cold approaching, since that seems like the only successful path now a days.
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