So, I had this phone sex with a childhood guy friend of mine who was once upon a time my ex boyfriend as well. We broke up 3 yrs ago after dating for quite long. And it took a real toll on me. I found it very hard to move on and, just this year I decided to finally be in a relationship with someone. But then it didn't work out and we broke up after 4 months of dating. And my ex turned up out of the blue and we started talking late night and he even told me he likes and loves me. But it's like so hard to trust him he really do because it's been so long since we broke up and also, he was in relationships after we broke up so, I just find it hard to trust him when he says he likes/love me. I told him about this too, and he told me he finds me different from other girls and that he wants to cherish me and see me happy. So, I got confused whether he loves me as a friend or more than that? At times, he would seem like more than a friend and at times, he would seem like just a friend. So, we somehow ended up having phone sex after talking for some days. Idk if it's my hormones or because I feel for him because I'm someone who likes to get all intimate only with my significant other aka my boyfriend. So, hooking up with a friend having FWB kinda bond makes me feel sick. And rn I'm feeling guilty about it too. I told him I don't want a FWB kinda thing with him or anyone else. He shrugged it off like telling me we are still young and whatnot which really made me feel used. I felt like he would do all these stuffs to any girl and it simply made it feel disgusting to me. I told him this as well. And he kept silent being somehow offended by it when he himself told me that we are to have fun and all that bullshit stuff. I don't get him. For me, doing all this kinky stuffs with a friend is so wrong to me even if I'm single atm. At some point, I want to know whether he wants us to be more than friends or just entanglement which I clearly don't want but at the same time, I don't want us to be more than friends so soon as well. It's so fucked up. Can someone help me please?
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