Hey guys, so I’ve been seeing this girl for a few months, started strong and everything was great. She introduced me to her close friends, family members, asked me to do the same wich I did even if I felt it was kinda going fast.
To give more context, we’re having a lot of fun together, we have a lot of common points and a similar lifestyle, wich is really nice. But here comes the red flags, she’s inconsistent, hot&cold, and I know that’s because she’s still seeing her ex, not just as friends (their relation ended 1 or 2 years ago, its not recent). She doesn’t know that I know about them. Right now she’s getting the best of both worlds, but I can feel that she’s not that comfortable in this situation. She tried to cut ties between us recently, saying she wasn’t good enough for me. Im not the one to chase, so I just disappeared for 2 weeks (helped that I was on vacation). The day I came back she sent me a message apologizing for the way she acted with me, that she felt bad, but still not mentionning her ex. My answer was simple, it’s ok, no hard feelings, take care. A few days passed and one night, while Im at the gym, she just shows up (she knows my gym schedule). I went straight to her just happy to catch up, wich she definitely liked because she invited me to her place the same night. Since then she asked me twice to see her, even invited me to a little night she had planned with her sister, her boyfriend and also another friends couple. I’m having a hard time figuring out what she wants, the ex is still there, but she really treats me like she wants something with me.
My question is, am I dumb for seeing this as a competition and still wanting her? Even if they have history, connection and all that I have a strong feeling I could be the one winning her over in the end. I could definitely go onto the next, but I feel like nowdays every girl has that one guy still in the background. At the beginning seeing her act this inconsistent kind of messed me up mentally, but I feel like this situation allows me to work on myself and the way I deal with me emotions, and recently I’ve been feeling ok about it, focusing on what I can control and letting go of the rest.
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