I'm turning 21 in less than a month, and never had ANY romantic experiences or dated in my life. Ive been introverted all my life, I was bullied alot for my looks, my voice, being overweight, things like that. My high school was all boys too, which sucked because most my teenage life I barely had no female interaction. I never had female friends either. I am 20 and still don't have female friends, but I've gotten better at talking to girls.
Now I know what most of you would say: stop being a crybaby, go to the gym, diet, get muscular, be confident, build wealth, etc. I know it would probably help me alot, but I feel like I'd lose myself in the process. When your whole life you have been judged by literally everyone in society, you can't help but want to 'change' yourself.
That also leads to this: I cannot show emotion. I haven't cried in 10 years. No matter how many times I was laughed at, bullied, embarrased in front of class I didn't cry, but I wanted to. Then I go on the internet which talks about how men should 'never show emotion' and 'embrace masculinity'. Now I know why there are way more male suicides. I feel those people who say this never experienced any trauma, ptsd or any kind of abuse. Then girls say they want their SO to be more 'emotionally available' but wonder why men can't show emotion.
Basically what i want to know is if there is a way to change myself without ACTUALLY doing it, that means to be confident without trying to fake it, or to look good without trying too hard. Sure I could just go to the gym, get a 6 pack in a few months, but I don't think that would really make me feel good in the long term. I have already lost more than 10kg, abd my face has changed to be 'more attractive' i guess in social media terms. But I still have belly fat and not really fit, yet.
I've read many reddit guides on seduction and dating advice, but most of them sugarcoat things and it always comes back to changing your physical attraction. I seriously don't know what to do anymore.
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