He (27m) came back after 3 months of no contact and seemed interested in more than friendship. How should I (24f) handle this? - ATX News Paper

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Tuesday, August 23, 2022

He (27m) came back after 3 months of no contact and seemed interested in more than friendship. How should I (24f) handle this?

I was casually seeing this guy from Hinge for 6 months. Both of us had reasons for being casual, but we connected on a deep level. Things in my life changed so I started wanting a more serious relationship. I knew he was still in the same place as before, so I ended it with him. He understood where I was coming from and it was an amicable "breakup," but it was still sad. He teared up a bit and hugged me several times. I cried a lot that first month because I was missing him so badly.

3 months later, I get a text from him asking to catch up. I replied and we got food/drinks last last weekend afternoon, at a restaurant near my place (he didn't want to make me drive to him). We were there for 2 hours, updating each other on our lives and joking/laughing a lot. It was like nothing changed between us. The whole time, I wondered if something was going to happen. We would stare into each other's eyes when there was a pause in convo and he would bring up things we did/said in the past. He also asked me if I was still using Hinge and told me he hadn't in a while, but then was like "where else do people meet." Afterwards, he asked to hang more so we walked around for another hour (spent 3 hours total together) and that was when things really got interesting. He touched my arms/shoulders a lot, and would briefly put his arm around me before we crossed a street. He gave me small compliments and showed off a bit. For example, he talked about building his abs more and was like "you already knew I kinda had abs, you've seen them" and lifted his shirt up. He eventually started feeling tired so we walked back. We reached my street (he'd parked the next street over) and I saw on his face he wasn't ready to separate yet. He asked if he could drive me home before deciding it made more sense to walk me. He came inside for a second to get a drink of water. After drinking some, he offered the glass to me to also drink from (we used to always share cups) but I said no. I asked him why he'd texted me and he said he just woke up one morning and was really wondering about me. He asked if it was ok that he texted me and how I was feeling, asked if we could see each other again. I said he caught me off-guard but today was nice, we could hang again. He hugged me goodbye and did some nice things for me before leaving (I had some shoes scattered near the door, they weren't in his way and he's not OCD but he picked them up to neatly align them against the wall. Also asked if I normally locked my door so he could lock it for me).

Honestly, despite the weirder parts, I was feeling our meet-up was overall friendly because we split the bill and he didn't do anything explicit. But then all my friends told me was definitely flirting with me and trying to gauge where he stood with me. And I think they're right, but I'm thrown off by the fact he hasn't reached out since (over a week). There is a decent chance he's waiting for me to text- I didn't really react to his flirting and I could see him questioning if I genuinely want to continue seeing him, since I wasn't actually sure myself at the time. But the common advice is that if a man really wants you, he'll initiate. So I'm not sure if I should text him and if I do, if/how I should ask him exactly what he's looking for.

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