I have been seeing a guy for the past 3 months. Things had been going really well lately, but within that time, he ghosted me twice.
The first time for 5 days (he didn’t wish me a happy birthday) and the second lasted 7 days. He explained he was going through a rough time and was getting fucked up off of Xanax by himself. He is 25 and has been taking Xanax since a junior in high school (not prescribed). He said doing it, makes him isolate himself. He doesn’t wish to bring people down with him so he just stays off the radar.
Things had been getting really serious within these past few weeks. He had a few bars left, gave them to his friends that are still in school, but saved one. I was over at his place last Monday, when he asked me to come into the bathroom with him, he had the Xanax in his hand and he said as long as I’m in his life, he would never take it again. This was huge for me. I was exciting because this was a great step for him and a positive direction towards us building a relationship.
Later that night, we talked about me flying out with him to AZ for Thanksgiving to meet his parents. This excited me and I loved that he was even thinking this. I usually tend to be one step ahead when it comes to dating and usually the guy isn’t there, but him and I were on the same page. Our time together was so natural and so easy. It’s nothing like I’ve ever experienced. He could say the same too. Come Friday afternoon, he texted me and I feel him acting so off. I try to figure it out but he doesn’t say much. He just hits me with “Is it okay if I hit you up tomorrow?” which caused me to freak out because that was how it started when he had ghosted me in the past. I reply back “Just talk to me on Monday.
Actually, I have a feeling I’m going to get hurt. So maybe you shouldn’t hit me up on Monday. Or at all.” I admit, it was a strong reply. It was in the heat of the moment and I wish I hadn’t said that, but I was being protective because of my past experiences with him. I think maybe he took it harder than I expected because of the progress he had made and thought I was being serious.
I have tried calling and texting him but he blocked me. He unfollowed me on Instagram, but we are still friends on Facebook. I’ve tried reaching out to apologized but no response yet. I feel as thought I fucked everything up and hurt his feelings, but I can’t help but also think he was missing Xanax which was causing him to feel off, and is doing it again.
I don’t know, I haven’t told anyone in my life about this and it’s eating me up on the inside. I had been talking so highly about him and then he does this. I feel embarrassed and unloved, to be honest. I’m not really sure what else to make of the situation.
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