Hi there! So, long story short: I had an ED in my 20's, amenorrhea, no libido. Few months ago something changed, a lot actually, and I also got my period and my libido back. But...no experience in the field (even in my teens I was not interested, I had sex only with one guy, it was a painful experience...). So, I met this guy on Tinder. We meet, immediately I jump on him, he accepts (ok, to be fair, he insisted meeting me, so I trusted him in a way...but with no experience, everything is new for me, and in this are I feel- and look, to be honest-as someone a lot, lot younger than 30). But, after fast clicking/making out, I just couldn't have sex with him. Too afraid, too painful, too overwhelming. So I was feeling kind of guilty (eventhough, to be honest, when we were texting, I said I am not going to have sex with him and that i have lots of problems with self-confidence and that generally I am not a very cheerful person, but he said he was just trying to find a normal girlfriend...but while he was with me, he said that in the past he slept with 80 girls...) and I said the next time I will sleep with him. So after 2 days he returned, with a condom (because I mentioned I want protection, eventhough he doesen't use it), but still I had this kind of wall inside me and I couldn't do it. I told him I had anorexia, amenorrhea (I didn't talk a lot about it, I just wanted to mention it because I wanted to justify my lack of experience), but it seemed like he didn't really catch the importance. Anyway, he left telling me he is not the right kind of a guy for me. What I would like to know is how to approach others in the future? Should I accept sex as "not a big deal"? Do you think I would feel better now if I did sleep with him, aka maybe he wouldn't have left? I was very hurt and cried, but I think I just need to take things less seriously. I appreciate every answer of yours, but please, having been hurt 2 weeks ago, I would be gratefull if you don't post negative, non constructive comments.
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