Would you feel betrayed by your brother throwing a party your ex attends but he never even tells you she was there?

So I have this thing with friends and breakups, I won’t try to befriend ex’s of any of my close friends, to me it feels like a betrayal of the friendship even if it’s platonic. Unless of course we were friends during their relationship that’s different. I’m wondering if its an unrealistic expectation to expect the same? Here’s the story

I found out my brother had a party and my ex was invited by a mutual friend. My brother never said a word to me about her being there. She told me, about a year after it happened. My brother and my ex were not friends before or during our relationship, they knew one another but that’s it.

Now, If it was my party I would have made it clear that my friend should not invite my brothers ex. I would do that because his feelings are important to me and I would not want to create a situation where someone may feel hurt.

Is it an unfair to assume it’s common sense that if you value someone as a friend or family member you would make sure their ex doesn’t attend a party you’re having? And does the fact that it was kept secret mean they knew it was unfair or wrong and did it anyway? And what would motivate someone to do something they would have to hide?

submitted by /u/jnorthshore
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