Im 24 (m) in college I’ll start off and say this there was a time last year where I went on 64 dates in a span of 2 months. I was having 2-3 dates a day and Saturday was 5 dates with 2 hour intervals in between. I dumped probably like 4k on meeting that many women and those were all first dates. All of them came from hinge and tinder. According to a lot of women they rank me as a 6 when it comes to attractiveness. (TBF that doesn’t bother me I’m just leaving that in to say I don’t consider myself a 10 nor do I consider myself a 0). Out of those women there were 4 I went out up to 3 times and one that became my girlfriend (until she cheated on me). After the inability to get into a healthy steady relationship I quit dating and I went on some dates here and there. The reason I went on these dates was because I was desperately lonely in the fact I was single. My highschool friends all had girlfriends, my local friends 2 of them got married.
In the meantime I was having a blast, straight As in my classes, hiking to spots I’ve never been, grinding out my videogame ranks peaking out of my mind.
Now fast forward to present I’m working in my mechanic shop and this gorgeous girl and I start talking. Let me tell you I was shaking with nerves as I was helping her. I worked up to finally in a way get her socials. The first message I sent to her on her socials was (paraphrase)“ hey I like you, what’s your number, I want to go on a date”. Would you guess it worked and we are going out soon.
So now the date approaches and I’m filled with hopeful expectations things will work out. That she gave me her socials and number because she’s moderately interested (2 times she could’ve said no). There’s also the realist in my though that knows that this is just one date and it could mean nothing, or this is could be just her being nice.
I don’t want to get crushed in dating again where I just go and do my own things. I also don’t want to be so pessimistic where I see things happen as luck or accidents. I’ve always been optimistic, trusting, and I put my all into everything I do which makes dating even harder when things don’t work out.
Also I got over being the lonely part of dating. I really do want a girlfriend which plays into part on why I’m nervous, have expectations , etc…. But im not craving for it as I was.
Any tips or advice when it comes to be an optimistic dater/ hopeful romantic?
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