To preface this a bit, I’ve had sex with three men in my adult life and every single one has hit me with the “I’m just not looking to get into a serious relationship right now” line. It’s not a surprise bc the dating scene right now is almost exclusively filled with this trope, but it isn’t any less hurtful. These dudes didn’t give off fuck boy vibes, and before you tell me that the best ones don’t, just stop. We went out. We had several dates. We built up pretty solid connections before the rug was pulled out from me each time. It’s also weird bc I’m not a serial monogamist. I wasn’t and am not looking to just date anyone. But over the last year, this has been my luck. I’m also a late bloomer when it comes to dating, so maybe that plays a part.
It’s hard because I enjoy sex and I don’t want to go all old school and require that a relationship begin before I decide to have sex with someone, but it’s also hard to tell whether or not the person plans on trying to actually date me. I feel like I’ve been duped with the last few guys. They all voiced and acted like they rly wanted something.
The cycle I’ve been in lately is this: meet a guy, talk for a few weeks, go on a proper date, go on a few more, have sex, continue to talk, maybe hook up once or twice more and then bam: the dude only wants to hook up. I wish I were capable of being someone who could do this without a second thought and move on to the next, but it sucks. It’s also hard because the first few dates feel like they should be light and fun, so I don’t want to jump the gun and tell them this like I’m expecting them to be a POS, but I’ve also done the thing where I say that I don’t like just hooking up and that’s it and I’ve still been tricked, so it blows. I get this happens all the time and I’m not alone. I’m just unsure of how to go about avoiding this without scaring the dude off before it can even begin.
[link] [comments]
from Dating Advice http://bit.ly/2WCCkav
via IFTTT
No comments:
Post a Comment