Preface: This may be a jumbled mess with grammatical errors because auto correct on my phone hates me, and I typed this up for a friend on snapchat
I love my gf deeply, and I think she's sweet, smart, funny, and very stable emotionally. Although I think she's great, sometimes im left overthinking in the relationship for a few reasons. All of these things have been brought up and talked about at least once on different occasions. 1) She's emotionally reserved, and it's very difficult to know for sure how she's feeling or if she's going through anything at all that would typically be shared with a partner to figure out. I find that she relies on chatgpt for advice or discussion on things that are sensitive to our really and then doesnt discuss it with me which I fear may lead her to be emotionally satisfied while I am emotionally unsatisfied due to not having these intimate and necessary conversations. 2) She has little to no sex drive because of the birth control that she is on, and she just went to the doctor today who confirmed this is the case. Although we are both aware that these are the circumstances of this birth control, I can't help but feel unattractive and sexually undesirable, which more than sucks because im a very sexual person and enjoy the pleasure sex brings I've tried role playing, flirting more, sitting down conversations, and so on, but she rarely, if ever, initiates sex. Pursuing makes me feel like im taking advantage of her, and it's such an icky feeling to sit with. Overall, I personally feel like even though we are in a relationship and have our sweet, loving moments, mutual respect, and similar interests ....it sometimes feels like solely an estranged friendship. This has been weighing on my heart for weeks now, and I dont really know what else to say or do because we have spoken about these topics, and I really do love her/cherish our time together. What doesnt help is that I saw text from her last relationship (about 1 year and some months ago) where she was speaking with her ex the way that I wish was being pursued as well as other sensitive content. We've discussed the sensitive content, maybe not so much the texts, so there was an understanding reached and plenty of apologizing on her end as well as offers to reconcile any way I see fit. This is great. It still stings, though, once in a while despite me feeling like she's building up trust with me by being her lovely self. Idk its just a tough position to be in and today I almost cried at work grieving the relationship that we're still in as if my body is trying to tell me its over even though I really dont want it to be.
Are there any recommendations at all about how I should approach this?
TLDR: Boyfriend feels like girlfriend isn't completely meeting his relationship needs and is deeply conflicted about steps forward considering her being a great person otherwise.
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