How to not let emotions take over me when out with a person I really love and value - for who I have feelings for? - ATX News Paper

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Saturday, July 9, 2022

How to not let emotions take over me when out with a person I really love and value - for who I have feelings for?

Due to my anxious attachment style, the way I show affection can be a bit clingy and because of that + feelings for a close friend = I might f**k up "potential chances in the future" and current friendship and that's why I want help.

This girl left 4 years relationship few months ago - currently ( from talking with her about it ) she feels emotionally tired, not creative and just empty - althought she wants to meet new people and exchange experience with them. Currently everything is fine ... well, due to my feelings and I guess "emotions" being on the front, whenever we go out with her and her group of friends and a guy tries to hit on her in some way, I would get anxious - my mood would literally die, she would easily spot it since we know each other PERFECTLY and later we would argue about the problem - which in most cases is me having feelings for someone who for the current time wants to be alone and focus on career + from what I could tell she isn't over her ex but she is over with the relationship and the idea of being with him. She never mentioned - I don't see us as a couple or "get me out of your head, we are friends and that's it"..

Anyway, my question is - how to put emotions in the back and in such scenarios act normally? I really don't want to lose her as a person cause the last two times we were out we would chat when home about what was wrong this time - which was my emotions and I would see a change in her mood towards me ( which is pretty normal since I unintentionally make her sad because of my mood swap bcs of feelings).

How to not let emotions overtake me? I have moments where I feel that I'm slowly being "replaced" by new people she meets yet she always mentions that she values me a lot ... I really need advices how to stop being so emotional near here ( also that happens only when a guy tries to hit on her or is touchy with her, whenever we are alone or nothing like that happens - I'm acting perfectly fine).

submitted by /u/unregihea
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