So I (21M) have previously posted about this girl (21)I have been seeing and she told me she has HSV. I didn’t want this to make us stop seeing eachother but we had sat down last night and talked about it. Basically my point of view on this was I would not have any sex with her until we were together long enough to the point where I saw a future with her, I already feel for her a lot but I need to spend real time together with her and be more serious before I can tell if this is something long term. I don’t think that’s very unfair and thought I was still giving her the chance and seeing her as a human not as her condition. Sadly, I was met with a text this morning of her saying she thought of everything I said and she would feel too insecure to be in a relationship like that so she would rather be friends. I know she is insecure about it all the time it’s not easy to deal with. But I’m disappointed she could not have seen it from my view and grew together with me on a human level not physical before we started to risk transmission. I did not think she was going to say that and it has kinda made me really upset. I know you can’t force people to be ready for something and conform to special rules but she claims she wants to be with me and sees this as something that may be long term. I’m unsure as to why she wouldn’t want to just try to see if the connection deepens after being together for a while. She thinks this condition makes it hard to be in a relationship and here I am trying to work with her but it’s too much for her mentally. Tbh that actually makes it worse cause I feel even worse for her since I realize how insecure it makes her feel and that’s a feeling no one should have to have. I guess this is more of a rant post than a question.
TLDR: girl I have been seeing has HSV but I want a relationship still but I would have to abstain from sex for a while and that’s not something she could handle mentally so it may not work out between us even though I really want it to.
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