I don’t think I’ve ever had my shit together and I’ve been alone most of my life. So I’m wondering - what does it mean to have your shit together?

This is sort of piggybacking on another recent post about having your shit together before you start dating. I’ve never felt that I’ve had my shit together, and so I’ve opted not to date most of my life because of this.

Part of this is tied to insecurity, for sure, but I also think it has to do with understanding what it means to have your life in “order.” To help me understand this more from others’ perspectives, in your opinion, what does it mean to have your shit together?

For those interested, these are the reasons I don’t think I have my shit together (let me know if I’m crazy for thinking this):

• I graduated with my bachelors in my late 20’s due to economic circumstances
• I graduated about two years ago, and my entry level jobs don’t pay great ($15/hour) and I’m not passionate about them at all
• because I don’t make much money, I have an old car and chances are I’ll have it for a while
• my credit is poor because I used part of it to pay for school and other needs
• I’m roommates with my siblings because I can’t afford a place on my own (and I’m close with my family, so I prefer to room with them over strangers)
• our parents live with us because they can’t afford their own place, so we help them that way (but I think a lot of people will take this to mean I live with my parents, when it’s the other way around)
• because I have two part time jobs, the commute leaves me with little free time after work, so I just relax by watching Netflix and such
• I do have hobbies when I have the time, but they’re very “individual” (editing videos, writing, watching movies)
• I don’t have many coworkers at all, and with my hobbies being “individual” I don’t get the chance to meet people and I haven’t had a group of friends outside my siblings since I graduated college
• I’m out of shape because I hate exercising and like eating bad food, and I get the impression that someone that has their shit together will be in shape and eat more health conscious

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