Backstory: I’ve (21F) have been casually dating this guy (23M) for almost three months now. It just kind of happened. We were friends for about a year or so and would flirt from time to time but then back in June I asked if he wanted to hang out. It was great. We kissed and then from there we just decided to go on dates for fun and such. We didn’t really talk as much before hand. He would call or text me once in a while and they would be good long conversations (he was busy with work and other stuff). I was fine with this cause there was (and still is) stuff I need to work on with myself before I get into a relationship.
Lately though: he’s been way more consistent. Calling and texting me every single day. We talk on the phone for hours and just enjoy each other’s company.
Yesterday was my 21st bday and he took me out to dinner and came back to my place where we had such a great time talking, cuddling, chilling on my patio looking at the stars, etc. he even ended up spending the night cause he was too tired to drive back home. But the problem is is that I’m STILL waiting for the other shoe to drop. For him to ghost me. Play me. Break my heart. Something. It’s happened to me SO MANY TIMES where men would treat me like gold and then turn around and leave or play me. So now I’m so scared of him doing it to me. He’s clearly showing with his actions that it isn’t his intention to hurt me and that he genuinely liked me FOR ME. Not for my body.
My therapist did tell me to just enjoy the moment which DOES help but it doesn’t change the fact that at this point, if he were to hurt me; it would hurt. Even though there would be nothing I’d be in the wrong for in this situation. Nothing is gonna stop that. I don’t know, I’m just so use to being screwed over that I expect for it to happen every time I date. Am I alone in this? What did y’all do to fix it?
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