My gf is 26, I'm 32m and have one child from a previous relationship. She, for no particular reason (I asked, she just has a thing about 'firsts' in relationships), wants her first to be with someone whom it would aslo be their first kid. So, she asked me if I would be okay with her having a kid with her ex because he doesn't have kids, everyone else has them that she knows and it's a better alternative to a complete stranger... I told her it was her choice who she has children with, quoting the 'your body, your choice' ideology and that I would give my decision after she made her own because mine should not affect hers, considering I'm not involved with the actual bringing about a life bit. I'm just the BF in this scenario.
That being said, I've no clue how I should feel about this request. I'm torn as can be. On the one hand, I fully support her wanting to have a kid on her own terms, but on the other I love her and want to share the experience with her and not sit on the sidelines whilst another gets to share in this with her. My first kid was messy and I never got any of the fatherly experiences oriented around parenting and I feel like I missed out on it. My child is three and I am seeing her now but was kept out for most of her life up until a few months ago and I still have that want as far as parenting instincts for a newborn and seeing all the firsts and other really stage things that come with rearing. My gf did say her next would be with me, and that's... that's just even more depressing to hear.
Idk, thoughts... opinions... anyone ever heard of something like this? I feel like it's a surrogate mother type situation with a whole new twist and while I'm all for groundbreaking, it really feels overwhelming to have to consider such a prospect in a personal sense.
Keep in mind this was just a discussion brought up before she had even approached the ex about it, so nothing is decided or concrete.
Edi: didn't think this was necessary to mention, but vitro is the option she would go with, not intercourse...
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