Don’t be afraid to tell someone how you feel, even if you are afraid of the consequences. When I was 21, I was in a this situation and never took the chance. We literally laid together in his bed, and the moment just passed us by. I was young and not in touch with my feelings. He had a very difficult time expressing his feelings, as well.
If you are in a similar situation, try going to a therapist to figure out what is keeping you from sharing your feelings. My life was so much better once I went to therapy and could sort out my thoughts. When you tell this person how you feel, you want to make sure you are at your strongest mentally so you can in a healthy way handle whatever comes next.
This may be morbid, but I sometimes ask myself who would I want to talk to if I became terminally ill? You are less afraid to be honest when you have nothing to lose. I would obviously tell my friends and family how I felt about them….but I ask myself if there is anyone in my past that I would want to talk to, and I would 100% want to reach out to the guy I mentioned above. The problem is that he is married now. But I think I would still say how much our friendship meant to me and that I’ll always wonder what would have happened if we had acted on our feelings. I just think we humans believe that there will always be more time and opportunities, but it’s simply not true.
I actually need to work out my feelings in therapy because my friend and I haven’t spoken in about 7 years (I was invited to his wedding though) and I have been married since then….but I can’t seem to shake him. Every time I go through something, my mind wanders to him for comfort. Sometimes I feel that he is the last person that really knew me before my adult walls went up. He seemed to like me for who I was….flaws and all. Maybe that’s why I can’t forget him….I probably have idealized him too much.
My point is….don’t be me. Go for it. Then you’ll never think “what if”.
❤️
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