I've been on dates with a handful of girls the last year and there have been ones that I wanted to take things further with and ones I was content with seeing them go.
Along the way, I've been able to put three more pieces of the puzzle together and they are as follows.
- If they want to see you, they will make it happen. Genuine attraction cannot be ignored and even if they are extremely busy, they will make it happen. If they don't make an attempt, move on.
- If you ask someone out and they say "I can't" and do not offer an alternative time immediately, move on.
- If you don't feel with absolute certainty that there is a mutual connection or attraction after the first date, move on.
You cannot negotiate, explain, bargain or barter your way into someone's heart. There's no reasoning either.
Whatever you do, keep moving forward.
Edit: three, not two pieces to the puzzle.
Edit 2: I've been reading the feedback related to point #3 and while I understand where some of you are coming from and have had positive outcomes after a "dull" first date, I think the point is being missed.
You can usually tell that someone is shy or nervous. You can also put things together that indicate someone is not interested. This is particularly true for men because we operate under the assumption that the girl, if she is active on social media, has a handful of other guys waiting to take her out as well (this could also go the other way).
The overarching theme here is, you have to be decisive. A lot of people in the dating sphere and on this subreddit continuously ask questions revolving around "is she into me". You should have a pretty good idea after spending a few hours with her. Psychologists say a person has made up their mind whether they are interested in you or not in within the first 10 seconds. I think there is some merit to that.
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