Hello reddit,
This is more of venting session to get it out, but some advice or clarity would be appreciated as well.
I (32M) met a woman at a bar back in October. She was 6 weeks out of a divorce and that relationship lasted 12 years total (I knew, full well, that this was just a bad idea for me to pursue but I decided to pursue it anyway). We instantly hit it off. We had a ton of fun went on a few trips and made some of the best memories that we've had in our lives (she said this to me multiple times and I felt the same). Throughout the 2 months we were together she would tell me how happy I made her and how I treated her head and shoulders above anything she thought was possible. She was genuinely happy and me being the empath, I could tell she genuinely was. I was too.
Then she slowly got distant after New Years until she texted me saying we needed to talk, then broke up with me. She said she was trying to break the pattern of always being in relationships and just didn't have the bandwidth to pursue anything with anyone. She told me its nothing to do with me (shes very attracted to me, feels safe with me, has a ton of fun with me and I make her laugh all the time) but has everything to do with her and where she is at. I respected her for this decision as I am also divorced (3 years ago, with a 5yo son). This sucked a lot but I took it on the chin, understanding wrong time or whatever you want to call it.
Fast forward a month with no contact, she is reaching out throughout the week. Asking how I am. Trying to catch up on where she is at and now wants to go get celebratory drinks with me when I finish 75 Hard. All of it is very friendly with no obvious signs of trying to rekindle.
Dumb question with no answers: Why break up if you still want to be involved in my life and ask me to go out for drinks?
The main thing I struggle with is that this feels like just a wasted opportunity. We meshed really well and had a ton of fun together and connected really deeply. I typically operate in the logic realm and nothing about this situation makes logical sense to me. Although, I recognize and have been told by friends that this was more an emotional decision to her.
Dating sucks.
tl;dr - Dated a woman for two months, had the time of our lives. Broke up with me saying "Its not you, its me". Now, a month later is reaching out often looking to hang out.
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