I (M27) have been talking with this girl (F25) for a little over 2 months, and we’ve gone on 3 dates in that time. After the third date, she told me she gets the feeling that I like her a lot, and while she is flattered she isn’t in a position to be in anything committed right now and wanted to keep dating casually, while also saying she wanted to see multiple people. She even brought up the word “date” first and referred to our previous hangouts as dates which surprised me. I was hoping they would be considered as such but didn’t want to say anything before I knew where she stood.
I do like her a lot, and part of me is thinking if there is the potential for all this dating to amount to nothing then I don’t want any part of it and would rather cut things off now to save myself the heartbreak later. But the lonely part of me wants to keep going out with her especially since she seems so enthusiastic about still spending time together.
I don’t have any real dating or relationship experience at all, and I’m a bit oldschool in the sense that when I’m interested in someone, I tend to focus all my attention on them rather than dating multiple people at once. This might also be because of my lack of experience. I feel like I don’t have any options most of the time, so when one potentially does come around I tend to get attached fairly quickly and ideally want things to work out long term.
How do I grow less attached to this girl for the time being to get more into the “casual” mindset? Should I wait for her to initiate the majority of our dates? Should I ask about boundaries like holding hands, kissing etc?
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