I [27F] have a pretty sad dating history from my first experience being an abusive situation, being used in hookup culture, some bad timings, and just unrequited love. Don't get me wrong there were some happy moments there, but for the most part I can't think of a meaningful romantic relationship I had and learned to grow independently.
I dipped my toes in online dating again after having some meh dates and met a nice guy [29M]. It was a slow burn experience where I didn't start liking him after the 3rd date. We dated for a month and I was pretty happy and I felt realistic as I didn't know that much about him but wanted to watch my feelings grow. He was extremely thoughtful, with a busy schedule always made time for me, planned dates and was an excellent listener, his mom knew about me and so did a few of his friends. It was meaningful to wait until 7 dates being sleeping with him. I felt secure and calm.
He had to go back home due to family stuff. He told me straight up that it wasn't going well. I had an hour call with him two months ago. Didn't hear for a month, reached out, and he said he was going through a rough time. I let him know he can reconnect with me if he'd like when he's back. There's been radio silence and I noticed he stopped following me on Spotify and unliked my playlists? I know I'm reading into this and it was just a one month stint, but I feel really sad and confused because he used to apologize for going MIA and was so straight up about his feelings. We both come from similar dating histories and everything felt like it was going well.
I guess my inability to spot red flags here, being that it was so early, scares me. How do people move forward after being ghosted? No closure sucks. I've been longterm single forever and never really happy with relationships. I can't help but feel cursed and I fear being vulnerable again.
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