How to get rid of the negativity of rejection - ATX News Paper

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Monday, June 29, 2020

How to get rid of the negativity of rejection

So here’s my story. It’s very simple. Last week I went on a 1st date through tinder. I thought it went pretty good. The conversation was smooth, we laughed we enjoyed each other’s company, takes about seeing each other again.

Then I text her. She’s slow to respond, she keeps the texts brief. It’s becoming clear that she’s not interested. Ok that’s a bummer. Also extremely common. Of course I can handle it, but that negativity still lingers. I felt like I did everything right, and yet I still got shot down. I don’t know what I did wrong. It almost fears unfair.

However, here is where it gets tricky. I know I’m not allowed to be angry at her. It was one date. She has the right to not like me, just like I have had the right to not like any other girl I’ve never liked. If I convince myself that she’s a bad person for ghosting me, then I’m going to end up hating humanity, since I guarantee we’ve all done something worse than the very small diss she did to me.

So here I am understandably a bit disappointed, and I can’t blame myself, and I can’t blame her. Sure we can all handle one rejection like this, but let’s face it we’re going to face this more than once in our lives. Even really good looking people will get rejected for no real reason. And it’s extremely relatable to have these rejections like these to build up, and either impact your self-esteem or make you dislike the opposite gender.

So here is what I did to make myself feel better. I exercised. I went for a run and built some endorphins and got that runner’s high. I didn’t do it, because I’m hoping to get in better shape (I’m already pretty healthy) and win her back. I did it because it felt good and released my negative energy. Plus it feels like I’m doing something productive, so it’s making me think I’m taking a negative into a positive.

This isn’t a perfect trick, but finding love is going to lead to a lot of disappointments, some big, and some small like this one. Doing something small and healthy to make yourself feel good about yourself, and not care about the small disappointments along the way.

submitted by /u/Tobes_macgobes
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