Is it a lost cause? - ATX News Paper

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Sunday, June 28, 2020

Is it a lost cause?

Hi al, hoping you can provide some insight on a situation. I (30m) dated this woman (31f) pre-pandemic/quarantine. Everything was going great and I was so excited to finally spend time with someone who felt “special” to me. We went on 5ish dates and things were great. Fluid conversation, similar interests and time just seemed to fly by whenever we were together. She eventually invited me out to the bar to introduced me to a few of her friends (around 8 or 9 people). Her best friend kept talking to me about how she was so excited to be seeing me and that she has never seen her this happy with a guy before. She mentioned that her friends also gave me rave reviews.

A few days later the pandemic hit and things became different. Conversation slowed down tremendously and she seemed to come across uninterested in talking. I gave her space but eventually things seemed the complete opposite of how they were so I asked if everything was OK. She said yes and that there was nothing to worry about. I took her by her word and moved on. Things continued and she eventually “ghosted” me for a week (also kept my distance to give her space) before eventually coming back. She was apologetic and told me she constantly thought about me the week we didnt talk.

I took her back because I still really liked her and wanted to continue to persue something with her. First few weeks were back to normal conversation wise (with the pandemic going on), however things quickly went back to the same as before. Disinterest, lack of communication and it felt like she wouldn ust answer to answer and not for the purpose of adding to conversation. This troubled me, especially during quarantine where I figured this would be a great time to just talk and continue to get to know eachother. I eventually got over it and told her it was best to take a step back. She agreed and said the pandemic changed things and she needs to focus on herself and her ongoing anxiety. I was very understanding and really just want her to be okay. She mentioned she cares about me alot and really likes me but needs to just handle herself. I told her to worry about herself and wished her luck during the quarantine.

I reached out three times since. One text she replied with a quick reply. Another text with nothing, and I called and left a voicemail which resulted in no call back. It’s going on 4 months with no contact.

I really still care about her and think about her constantly. She I eventually reach out again or is it a lost cause?

Thanks for reading and sorry for the long thread!

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