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Saturday, June 27, 2020

Work colleague crush

I have fancied my colleague since I met them three years ago but they were engaged. During this time I’ve done a pretty good job of pushing my feeling aside for the sake of our work environment and also the fact that I really like their fiancé. There’s always been a slight element of flirtation but just like 5% - not often or frequent enough to be a big thing, but enough that I’ve noticed. Earlier this year they broke up, on her behalf, and i was obviously upset for my colleague. By this point it’s been three years of me being realistic that he was going marry the love of his life, but now?! I don’t even know how to describe our current relationship but our work colleagues (who are all friends because we’re all the same in our department) keep commenting that we would make a cute couple and we keep flirting every time we see each other in person. But outside of that - less texting than normal. Part of me thinks he’s not interested and part of me thinks he’s doing what I’m doing - not texting because he’s interested but doesn’t want to seem that way. We were both in work this week and flirted a ridiculous amount and now he’s popping up on local dating sites. My question is - do I match with him? Even if I play if off as a joke? It’s definitely not a joke on my part but confessing how I feel feels like a weird violation. I suppressed my feeling for years in order to make our relationship purely a friendship on my part but now I feel like all those emotions are flooding to the surface. Am I just a dickhead? I can’t be objective and need help. I fear I’m reading too much into this.

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