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Sunday, August 1, 2021

Started dating him but am I overthinking things?

I [23F] started dating my coworker [22M]. I’ve known him and have been hooking up with him for about 2 months beforehand. He initially was the one who started hitting on me, and we have been in a pretty good place for a while now. He’s always been a chill guy, never obsessive. We used to be FWBs, but I asked him out on Tuesday after we went on a 2 day trip together with my other friend.

Here’s how that conversation went:

Me: I want to be in a relationship with you. Do you?

Him: Sure. I have nothing better to do

And that was that. His response made me feel insecure, so I later talked to him and asked him again.

Me: Are you happy I asked you out?

Him: Yes

Me: So there are no problems?

Him: No, I’m happy

Ok so that made me a little less worried. But his actions since then have bothered me. On Wednesday he came over after work for 1 hour just to have sex because he was too busy to stay. I asked when I’d see him next and he said Friday maybe. Friday comes and he’s too busy. He says he’s too busy to see me all weekend as well because he has school work. He told me he would Face Time me Friday. He never did. On Saturday he finally FaceTimed me distractedly for 10 minutes and hardly asked me any questions. He then said he had to go and he said he would message me. He didn’t.

This dude works 60 hours a week while doing full time nursing school. He also cooks all the meals for his parents and siblings. I know he’s busy. He has always been bad at texting. We only ever had one date together and everything else was hanging out after work a few hours together to have sex.

Everything is just giving me bad vibes. Like he’s not interested. But maybe he really is just too busy. I just wish he would want to see me, but the amount of times I have asked to hang out and he ends up being too busy is a lot. I really hope it’s just because he’s doing full-time school and he’s not disinterested. He has had two chances to tell me if he wasn’t! How do I cope with not being able to see him a lot? I think about him every day.

submitted by /u/troubledyouth15
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