How to Express Interest w/o Scaring them Off - ATX News Paper

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Tuesday, September 12, 2023

How to Express Interest w/o Scaring them Off

I [34M] have gone on a few dates with this woman [29F]. I'm really interested in her. We kissed after our last date. But I can't read her. Her texting is very intermittent, I've made some friendly flirty comments that go unacknowledged, but she keeps the rest of the conversation going. When we are out she tells me how she wants to keep going out and expresses that she's having a great time, but I can't get her to be forward about things when we aren't out. So far I've had to initiate everything, which is ok but not being able to get a solid read on her feelings/intentions is starting to weigh on my mind.

I think she likes me but I am unsure. I don't want to scare her off being so forward but I would also like the peace of mind of knowing where she stands.

What's the best way to express that to her without coming off like I'm trying to move really fast or push her too hard. She said she's been single a couple years and hasn't dated much at all since now so part of me thinks she's just naturally slow rolling it, which is fine as long as I know that she is actually interested in getting to know me more. If she isn't I'd move along and try to date elsewhere, but if she is I'd have no problem doing things at her pace. I don't want to date just for the sake of dating, but we've only been out a few times and I don't know her on that deep of a level which is where I want to take it.

I don't have much experience with this kind of topic when dating. The last time I expressed that I was interested in someone and wanted to get to know her more than small talk and dinner dates she immediately pushed me away and in the back of my mind was the constant "what if I never said anything and was just patient?"

Any tips? I'm sure I'm overthinking it and have been trying to check myself the last few days but can't seem to shake it constantly being on my mind.

submitted by /u/burkechrs1
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