I’ve been dating this girl for the last month. She’s kind, beautiful , smart , funny - everything I want in a woman. We share the same values and projections for the future. We’ve both been in constant communication throughout the dating period , several meetings and ive stayed at her. We’ve been intimate since our second date. After this previous weekend out of nowhere she then freaks and says she doesn’t know if she’s ready , still healing from her past etc. she said she’s needed space and time alone as she’s been completely overwhelmed, which this past week I’ve given to her. I did ask if I could check in with her at the end of the week and she said of course I can. I did that , and she replied but then didn’t want to keep the conversation going so naturally I have left her to more space. I’ve done abit of reading about avoidant attachment and listened to some podcasts. She completely fits the mould. I thought I was a secure attachment but I’ve become an anxious attachment.
This is really stinging as I get this is something she cannot help , I’m just finding it hard to deal with the fact she never really gave me a straight answer, and of course I don’t want to smother her when she clearly wants space. Anyone else either avoidant or dealt with this, how do you navigate ? Do I simply wait in hope she that talks when she’s ready? I obviously don’t want to just walk away from her , we had such a great connection and if there’s any chance of restoring that I’m willing to wait for her as she’s worth it in my eyes. I know people will jump on straight away and say she’s not interested move on etc. yeah I’m not interested in that advice , I know what I need to do if she doesn’t come back to me. I just want to avoid pushing her away at all costs. Any advice on this would be greatly appreciated , finding it really hard to settle currently.
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