Throwaway cuz I'd really like to get past this, sorry in advance for the novel. I (21M) started getting really close to my supervisor (24F) at work last summer. As we worked together more and more, we'd get closer, she would flirt a little, and I would just act casual. I even remember one instance where she leaned against my arm and put her head against my shoulder while we were writing up some reports. I definitely felt something toward her too but I'd always kinda just not acknowledge it because of how....weird it felt to me & plus I was dating someone else at the time (which TANKED last October).
I ended up getting promoted to what is basically her assistant supervisor and we started getting even closer. Heck, during the Christmas party we were pretty much joined at the hip. Again, I never really acted on things but this time it was because I was just overall numb to everything from an awful breakup and basically losing all of my old friends from the resulting grief/depression/rut/whatever you wanna call it.
Now, I'm past all of that, and of course we've been spending more time at work together due to a bunch of new-hires that we've been working together to train. But now, she's moving on to different and better things career-wise and will be flying out to different states for different stretches of time. I couldn't be more proud of her but also I'm gonna miss her like crazy. That's already a given.
What isn't, however is how I really feel about her. Last night we had a little goodbye dinner and it was a wonderful, wonderful time but it's really bringing forth different things I'm feeling. TBH I have no idea at all if I'm just hurting because I'm gonna miss her, or if I actually have these deeper feelings. I also have no idea if she feels the same or if I'm just heavily projecting due to how emotional the goodbye has been and I definitely don't want to look like an idiot if were to say something then realize that none of these feelings are true. I really really don't know what to do and I'm running out of time before she leaves
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