I've been single my whole life, and not for lack of trying. Since I was a kid, I've longed for a loving relationship with a girl. I tried every piece of advice, watched Youtube video after Youtube video about how to get a girl to like you, and asked out basically any girl who I thought was a catch. I did everything that Reddit, dating gurus, and "the experts" told me to do. I feel like I've grown a lot in the past few years. I've made new friends, work out, go to a great school, have a huge scholarship, go to church, hang out with friends on the weekends, etc. But why can't I succeed in this one area of life?
Unfortunately, if I had a dollar for every rejection, I'd be able to drop out of college. I've never been on a true date, never had a first kiss, or even held hands. Honestly, just hugging a girl gives me an adrenaline rush. It feels like no matter how hard I try, no matter what improvements I try to make to myself, no matter how many times I followed the "just put yourself out there!" mantra, I'm doomed to just spend the rest of my days single. I'm at a time in my life where my fridge is about to be full of wedding invites and pregnancy announcements. The dating pool only gets smaller as you get older, especially in the Bible Belt where you're more or less expected to find someone and have kids by 25.
I know what many on this sub will say: "Just learn to be happy on your own! Singleness is great! Work on yourself! If you're not happy on your own, you won't be happy in a relationship. The right one will come when you stop looking." I understand that they mean well, but I don't know if I can believe that. I understand that rejection is a natural part of dating, but this has been going on for years. The fact that I haven't gotten one date in my whole life really gets to me. It makes me wonder what's wrong with me that nobody would consider me for a romantic partner.
I guess I'm at a point where I just wanna give up. I'm tired of investing so much only to get nothing in return. I'm tired of putting my heart on the line only for it to get crushed by my unrealistic expectations. I'm tired of the "just friends" speeches, "I'll think about it" texts, and feeling like yesterday's donuts. I'm tired of feeling like I'm not good enough for a relationship.
But that's the thing. I don't know where to go from here. I've spent my whole life chasing love, I don't know where else to go. How do I learn to be happy on my own? How do I learn to love myself without letting it become arrogance? How can I be happy without someone to hold at night, make breakfast for, and grow old with? How do I move on from this endless chase?
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