I (19F) have a best friend (24M) I'm really confused and obviously have not outright asked him if he has feelings for me outside of platonic friendship feelings. I am also well aware that if I want any sold answer I will have to ask, but I'm wondering if I'm reading too much into everything.
Background
We met in December at work, I was 18 and he was 23. We realized we went to the same college and around late February we started hanging out like everyday. It was great. I didn't really have any feelings for him besides platonic and everything. Term ends and we hang out again once the new term starts. On Monday and Wednesdays we eat lunch together at the cafeteria. On Fridays were together from 11-7 and we study and then go and play basketball. We both enjoy hanging out with each other, at least that's the vibe I get. I am in a rehab program because I got into legal trouble when i was a teenager so we don't really talk outside of like 9-4 m-f and random texts on the weekends. We also are very sexual with each other, like make jokes about hooking up etc. Everyone we mutually know thinks we are together. He also holds onto a bag of mine with my debit card, piercings, etc. things that I can't have at my program. So I am a little dependent on him and can't just not text him/see him etc.
The situation
Last Monday we started arguing, like arguing enough that I'm posting on Reddit. Monday's argument was about the fact that I was a "kid" and that I was too young for him to sleep with. Tuesday's argument was because I am overly sexual and that everyone thinks were dating. Wednesday's argument was about the arguments. Didn't see each other Thursday. Friday no arguments, we studied and went and played basketball together, which was fun as hell. We both were aggressive and had fun, he started guarding me on his side but other than that zero change. We wrap up the game and his roommate calls and unfortunately their other roommate had died. Shocked the shit out of both of us. Over the weekend he was seemingly fine, I know that he's struggling internally but he wont tell me and so I don't pry. Monday I texted him (Text conversation underneath)
Me: r u coming to school tmrw?
Him: Possibly but honestly might get my own room so I can focus don't take it personally
Him: How long are you staying Wednesday
Me: k, and im not sure yet, ill know tmrw,
Him: K
Me: damn capital K? ouch b
Him: Damn lowercase k, Da fuq Me: damn maybe its cause i miss u or somethin
Him: Okay so don't be saying k if you miss me I'm the type to walk not fight
This made me think maybe he's interested. Along with a whole thing about me saying I give the best blowjobs (obviously a thing meant for him) he said if you want a test subject let me know. He has a thing where he goes "oh yeah (my name)" or like in a mocking tone saying i'm a good girl etc. Tuesday we had a huge argument, i was on the phone with my friend while he was in the bathroom and came back and was upset bc he had to get to work, i was getting off the phone and I'm not sure what happened or what was said but he angrily packed up and told me to "have a good one". I texted and said I was sorry and he said he doesn't have time to deal with insignificant shit. I brought him cookies and we made up. I turned 19 yesterday (after our tuesday fight) I was on my way to the cafeteria for our lunch and he scared the shit out of me and we talked and he had to go to class. For my birthday he took me out to Red Robbin and we had lunch. He told the waiters it was my birthday and all the good stuff. I obviously cannot encompass our entire relationship but everything points in my mind to him liking me. We have a joke about the word therapist meaning daddy as well, so i call him therapist jason. Yesterday at lunch he was telling me he cares about me and said he thinks of me as a best friend and a little sister who needs help and who he wants to take care of and protect however at the end he was like and obviously yk im a therapist, your therapist. which i take to mean im daddy your daddy bc thats how we mean the word. We also joked around about me finally being old enough for him to fuck me. Last night i sent him a url to birthday sex by Jeremiah.
*Also a running joke that he is notoriously a dry texter because he favors calling way more*
Me: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vYMxOzxKYYo
Him: Bye
Me: you about it or what
Me: its either yes or no tf
Me: bye i'm joking😭
Me: r u awake
Him: No
Me: that's so wild
Me: well when u awaken call me
Me: bc i wanna talk to you
Him: I'm also probably not coming to school
Me: rough
Me: bro there moving my main bitch and im getting a new roommate
Him: That's tough
Me: i imagine that texting you is like breathing in the sarah desert
Him: I imagine that texting you is like having an extra chromosome
Me: i can't even come up with a comprehensible response
Him: You can't come up with anything comprehensible
Me: Well butter my biscuits and call me a meme lord! Looks like you caught me red handed trying to keep up with your wit. But hey, at least I'm having fun, and that's all that matters, right? Now let's buckle up and see if we can turn those "LOLS" into "ROFLS"!
Me: idk what ur doing today but if you want to go get food ill pay for it
Him: I'm going to lift and then study I have no time for shit rn
Him: So again don't take it personally but I'll probably be by myself the next 2 weeks
Me: whenever ur here nxt will you lmk so i can grab my card
Him: Ok
Me: thnx
This is our only conversation after my birthday. I don't know what to do, I want to keep my best friend. I really do care about him. I think he may be pushing distance between us because he cares about me more then he wants too? PLEASE HELP!
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