I (28f) am a big festival goer and flow artist. I have been spinning since about 2019 and I love it. It’s a great outlet and a really fun hobby. You meet lots of cool people in the scene and there are always fun events to go to. My bf (29m) of 2 years is also a festie however he is slowing down as he approaches his 30s. I respect it and I feel like we’re on the same page about how many fests we want to attend and prioritizing less of our time for that and more time together just us, camping with our two dogs, or other outdoor activities instead. I also don’t like leaving our dogs with my sister or dad every weekend. We used to have a roommate who loved the pets and was super helpful with watching them, but he recently moved out and we are starting to turn the house into our home. It’s lovely! The relationship is awesome minus one little thing. We have almost no shared social life. I like to go spin fire with my flow friends and pretty much every time I bring up an event that i want to go to it turns into some sort of disagreement. My bf continually states that “it’s just a look at me contest” and doesn’t understand why I want to go participate in these events. At the end of the day, if you don’t spin I totally get how a flow event could be boring from the sidelines. I love flow and I love watching the other artists and my friends get down, but I can appreciate that that’s not everyone’s cup of tea. However, my issue comes from him not wanting me to go to things. I would love it if he would come out sometimes, but I can deal with doing things on my own. He always wants me to just stay home with him. While I love spending time together, another night on the couch watching our favorite show vs. spinning fire on a Friday night are not of equal excitement to me. I like to go out. I like to do things. I thought he did too, but since moving in together he has become increasingly less willing to go do anything social, flow or otherwise. I’ve tried to bring it up but the conversation hasn’t been productive. It’s to the point where people are still asking me what his name is two years into our relationship… This is really starting to bother me and I can’t figure out a good way to have a fruitful discussion about it without it sounding like a personal attack and making him get defensive.
Thoughts, anecdotes, and advice welcomed.
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