Crushing on a coworker, and I feel scared - ATX News Paper

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Saturday, March 27, 2021

Crushing on a coworker, and I feel scared

So I work in a factory, and I have a coworker who I've been having a crush on since I started working there. He is tall and handsome. Fast forward, I became a close friend to his friend at work, and our common friend knows how much I like the guy. Sometimes our common friend teases me to him, so it was through him that I got comfortable to talking to him. I kinda made a self prophecy then when I first started, that he will be my soul mate lol, that's how much I like him. Anyway, at one point the three of us were bantering, I dont know exactly how it lead up to me blurting out, that the only reason I talk to Robert was so I could get close to him, my crush Brian. And I said I was just joking, trying to laugh it off to avoid feeling awkward. We all had a laugh but Brian said, he didnt think I was joking lol. So I guess from then on, I felt even more comfortable smiling at him and saying hi from time to time. There were more times after that, that I would say a compliment to him and he would just smile. Then now that i think about it, he was giving me compliments here and there too and I just say thank you but I I didnt much about it. The latest one was when he complimented and told me he liked my braided hair lol which was nothing special to be honest so I just said thanks lol.. so I went back to him and told him, I should probably keep braiding my hair since he liked it and he just smiled.. In addition I told him, in case he wasnt picking it up, I was flirting with him.. later that day I told him, I find him very handsome but that I liked better when he was clean shaven and that would make him even more handsome..then I just walked away... I dont know why I said that, I got a little too comfortable I guess.. then the next day, I noticed he shaved. I will not lie, I kind of picked up the vibe that he was trying to impress me. Fast forward to recently, we have been talking a bit more. He stopped at my station to ask about a job and got to talking a little bit and I told him, he should stop by a little bit more often. And the next day, when we got off work, he slowed down his pace when he realized I was behind him and told me he was sorry he wasnt able to stop by, and I told him it was no big deal, coz it really wasnt a big deal. Then he just said, "I'll put in more effort, okay?"..and I just blurted saying "oh my gosh, blush crush" lol and he just laughed. Needless to say, he has been stopping by at my station even just for a little bit, looking silly and pretending from afar from everybody that he was there about the job. I also told him I appreciated him coming around making my day and he just said, "it's the least I could do".. Anyway, his latest words were "I know you like me and cindy does too (she follows him around like a dog and they are very close and everyone in the factory is used to seeing them together, and me as well), but in general, I dont care about what she thinks about me. But you, you make me anxious".. and I wasnt sure how to take it.. because I felt that that was a negative feeling, so I asked him further why that was.. and he just said, "it's like I care about what you think of me..and it makes me feel anxious. It's like our boss telling me i would be good for the job that's opening up saying because I do a really good job. and it made me feel that as well..like I'm being expected of something when I'm being given compliments"... so those words confused me even further..I dont know if I'm just naive but I'm legit confused... I'm scared because I have the tendency to fall easy, and I've been disappointed far too many times.. I want to start avoiding him, but I honestly dont feel I can do that. I like him a lot but part of me is starting to feel I'm just gonna be hurt again.. any advice?? Could it be that he is confused as well, or am I reading too much into it? Thank you!!

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