Do not ignore the red flags - ATX News Paper

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Wednesday, April 1, 2020

Do not ignore the red flags

I (M 24) broke up with my ex (F 24) about two weeks ago. I was really relieved that I broke up with her. There were so many red flags, but I chose to ignore them. The first red flag was when she gets really mad at me over little things. One time she lowers the room temperature, then complained to me that it was cold in the room. I asked what she expects in a jokingly way since she's the one who changed the temperature. She blasted at me and said it was rude to ask what she expects. I was confused, but I let it slide. This thing happened every week. The biggest one of all was when my aunt was dying, I was pretty stressed and sad knowing that my favorite aunt was going to be dead soon. I needed my ex at that time, but she was not very good support. She told me that she is more important than my dying aunt. She said that my aunt is not much of a big deal like my mom. I was beyond pissed, but I chose to ignore what she said because I was vulnerable and did not need another shit in my mind. I did not talk to her for a week and a half because I was spending time with my family. When I talked to her again, she was furious and yelled at me about it in public. I felt embarrassed because she was yelling to me that I could have texted her in the middle of being with my family and my dying aunt. People in the restaurants were looking at us. When she went to the bathroom, this lady behind me turned at me and told me she was sorry for my loss. The sweetest thing I need to hear from a stranger. Later, my ex complained about the friends I hang out with, telling me that I have awful taste in friendships. After she said that, I lost all of my feelings for her. When I offered her help to move out of her apartment, she said it was nice to do that. Then I asked if she has a spare hand sanitizer. She bashed at me saying that I am selfish that I cannot drive to the store and buy one myself. It was sold out... I told her to fuck off and that I do not need her anymore in my life. What makes this break up easier was that there is this pandemic going on and we are all advised to stay at home. I am super glad I broke up with her before this quarantine, otherwise, I would probably shoot myself. Just recently, she texted me asking for help because she was sick and might have caught coronavirus (she kept going out too much). I blocked her. She is with her family so she should be fine.

If you spot a red flag in your relationship, talk to your gf/bf about it. If they choose to not listen to you, they are not worth your time at all. My ex refused to resolve the situation and believe we can move on, but the pain was still there. I looked back and the reason why I kept giving her chances was that I thought it would be fixable.

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