Hi :)
So there's this coworker I'm interested in and I was sure he's interested in me. We're both in our 30s.
We spend a lot of time together at work and have also met outside of work once. We're going to meet again soon.
A few days ago, we got closer than usual at work (he initiated everything that happened, and no we didn't hook up) and when we talked about it he admitted that there is more between us, he just enjoys how it is right now and doesn't want to complicate things.
Everything is as usual at work, but I'm nervous about meeting him again outside of work. Officially it's not a date, but we're going to one of his favorite restaurants, he said he would pay, then we're taking a walk and he wants to listen to some songs that are important to me together. Sorry, but that sounds like a date. And before we had even met for the first time, he started talking about the second time we meet and what we could do and called it a date. It seemed like he surprised himself when he said that though. The thing is, what he suggested when he called it a date is exactly what we're doing when we're going to meet.
I know that until about a year ago, he was in a really long relationship that lasted longer than it should have and he lost himself in it. Which is horrible of course and I understand that he doesn't want that to happen again. To me it just seems like he's so scared of this that he can't admit to himself how much he likes me. His actions show that he's really into me, our coworkers notice that there is more (some think we're dating), and he always talks about how much we have in common, praises all my traits that should show him that he doesn't even have to worry about him losing himself with me. And if we continue like this, maybe even go further, it will complicate things. So when do you guys think, we should talk about us again? It’s hard for me to judge because we also see each other at work and spend a lot of time there. So I don't know if any x amount of dates "rule" applies or if I should say something before more happens, like if he tries to kiss me for example. Because I do not want to be in a weird space between friendship and dating.
Thanks in advance!
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