Hello! Okay so this is going to be quite long. So I’ve been on 5 dates with this girl I met from Bumble. It is quite easily the best 5 dates I’ve ever been on in my life. She is incredible and our chemistry is something I’ve never experienced before. We both feel like we’ve known each other for years and everything is just so easy.
Anyways, as my title suggests she just got out of a LTR not too long ago (August). It was a very mentally abusive relationship that inevitable did some damage to her. She’s only been in my city for 3 years and has no family here. They’re living in other province and she’s here all alone. He treated her terribly for 90% of the relationship and she stayed as long as she did cause she had no one else. She had told me that she has always gone for the assholes cause that’s what she feels she deserves. I would be the first “good guy” that she’s gone for. She said she’s severely attracted to me, but has never gone for the non asshole type (which I would be). She has told me that she probably should have taken more time to heal because she isn’t 100% herself yet because of her previous relationship. She also says that she wants to keep pursuing this cause she sees it going somewhere but that I must be “patient” with her so she can continue to work on herself and be the person she knows she can be. I know, huge red flag...
On the 5th date last night, I was at her place and she broke down and started crying for an hour. She told me that she’s overwhelmed with me and that no one has ever treated her like I have. She keeps saying that I’m too good to be true and it’s really scaring her. She says not to worry and that she’ll get over the overwhelming feeling and that it’s just new to her. She always exclaims how much she appreciates me and all the things I’ve done for her in our limited time of dating. She also loves when I compliment her but she gets uncomfortable cause she’s used to guys telling her she’s not good enough and that she needs to try harder. She says that it’s weird to her that someone is putting in the effort and doing things for her because she’s used to being the one that did everything for her previous boyfriends.
The last thing is the sex. We’ve had sex once (date 3) but the last two dates had me do stuff to her (go down on her, stimulate her until she finished) and then that was it. Both times it just ended. She wouldn’t reciprocate on me and never even offered to. Once she finished that was it and nothing else happened after.
So, I don’t know what to do. I really like this girl and have made myself vulnerable but now I’m worried that I’m getting deeper and deeper into something that she’s not going to be ready for for a while. What do you guys think?
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